Thursday, November 10, 2011

sometimes it goes like this

On the hunt for stuff to get into, October 2011

Today, I am sorry to admit, my baby ate his own poop.

Need I say more?

He has become a total squirmy monkey during diaper changes, and this morning, he almost managed to kick the dirty diaper off the edge of the changing table. I caught it, but a tiny bit of poop must have fallen onto the floor, because after I had cleaned him up and re-diapered him and set him down and washed my hands, I turned back to see him putting a little light-brown, squishy thing into his mouth.

"What is that? Is that POOP?" I screamed.

This reminded me of a movie clip I saw once that often runs through my mind in these kinds of insane parenting moments, where the Experienced Mom analyzes the brown substance on her toddler's face. "Poop, or chocolate?" she asks, grabbing her child's dirty face while her childless sister looks on, horrified. "Poop, or chocolate? Poop, or chocolate?" She swipes a finger through the mystery substance and into her mouth. "Chocolate!" she proclaims.

This was like that, except there was no chocolate around.

There are two possible reactions to a moment like this: laugh or cry. And today, because Emry has an ear infection and is on antibiotics and isn't sleeping well and I don't know if these facts are related or he's just decided to stop sleeping well, and because two nights ago Elan woke up at 11 p.m. having spewed vomit all over his bed, sheets, mattress, pillows, stuffed animals, blankets, sleeper and himself, and because Elan then couldn't go to school yesterday which made his 4-day weekend into a 5-day weekend, and because that reduced the amount of time I have to do what I need to do from marginal to ridiculous, and because I'm feeling Mama-ed out right now what with someone always needing something, getting into something, crying over something, making a mess, waking me up, or sick, I cried.

Maybe next time I'll laugh. Except I'm really hoping to not have a next time. Really hoping.


  1. This has happened to me too when Ella was a toddler -- but it was the dog's poop. Ella picked it up and brought it to me. And I didnt know (and still dont) if she ate any before she brought it to me.

    I had to make the dreaded call to poison control, to ask what I should do. The guy on the phone was surprisingly mellow. He said he gets the "my kid ate poop" call everyday. And it is usually no big deal. haha.

    And Im totally with you about preschool days, and how much it sucks when they miss a scheduled day. Ella and Livi go twice a week (to different schools), and I find that we are all happier because of this break 2 days a week. They need a break from one another, and a break from the same-ness of home.

    And I need those two days for peace and productivity. When illness (or the preschool's many holidays) causes us to miss a day/week of school, we are all rather crazed by day 5.

    We will all get through it though. Hang in there!

  2. you are SO cracking me up right now and i really needed that. thank you! here's to keeping the poop where it belongs xxoo k.